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Saturday, October 16, 2010

People I can do without

I present for your consideration a list of people I feel the world would be perfectly well off without.

1: Yankees fans
These guys are like the certificate of participation of the sports fan world. Ok, I'm here, where's my ring? surely the fact that I've managed to get to the stadium without being mugged, raped stabbed or just plain getting lost means I've won the series, right? And so damned many of them are just bandwagoners. I knew a guy who was a Yankees fan, a Cowboys fan and a Lakers fan. Gee, front running much? Well, not this year with the Cowgirls at least.

2: People who can't figure out how to drive stick
I'm gonna let you in on a secret here, pal, that thing you're doing in your car. That's not driving. Driving requires at the very least the higher brain function required to know when to go from second to third. All you're doing is pointing a large lumbering projectile as the rest of the world hopes you at least don't mow down too many little old ladies and children. And please, get the fuck off the cell phone while you do it. The only thing that should be in the hand not holding onto the wheel is a god damned gear shifter or maybe, MAYBE a bottle of soda.

3: Militant anti carnivore vegetarians/vegans
Ok, I get it, you don't eat meat, possibly for health reasons, possibly for environmental reasons or maybe for some other reason. It's wonderful that you don't eat meat because you're not going to be the guy who buys the last bucket of the Colonel's specialty at the Kentucky Fried Taco Hut just before I get to the front of the line. But if you're going to give me shit about it, well, take it elsewhere pal. Last I checked this was a freeish country. If a guy can't enjoy a steak without a rant from some holier than thou preacher well, that guy might just have to go postal on you.

(You non militants though, you're OK in my book.)

4: Obnoxious wide receivers who have their own reality shows
When the fuck did the wide receiver become the superstar of the football team? You're on a team damnit, it's a team effort just getting to the point where the ball is in the air in your general direction and you're going to tell me that without you nothing would ever happen? And on top of that you're going to dress like a retard and act like a jackass? And people are going to pay you assloads of money to do all of this in front of a camera for VH1? Well fuck, it looks like I'm not going to be watching VH1 any time soon. And can someone tell me what the fuck the day to day like of a guy who catches a damned football has to do with music? Why the fuck is this shit on VH1 yet no one is doing a show about, I dunno, a band touring the nation? That douche from Motley Crue does Rock of Love and there isn't a damned show following someone around when they're actually MAKING MUSIC? Man, this country is fucked.

Well alright I had a bit of fun there ranting, but rant mode off for now. I just wanted to say hey look, I;m getting close to 200 followers and that's pretty cool. I didn't even realize it when I hit 100, so I wanna make something of it when I do cross 200. Catch ya later bloggyville.

25 comments:

  1. i fuckin haqte militant anti carnivore i would eat a cow in front of them!

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  2. nothing wrong with dem yankee fans boss!

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  3. You know what really grinds my gears?....

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  4. i drive stick and i can live without everyone wanting me to teach them!

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  5. lol, people who can't drive stick. Too true.

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  6. no one likes a stupid vegan
    if anything they should be gone and leave me to eat my burger of death

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  7. OHHH ! I hate those vegans who can't shut their mouth about animals and their rights ---- ANIMALS HAVE RIGHT TO BE TASTY ! xD

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  8. great story i also dont like vegans not because of they choice i dont like them because they are fkn boring with they stories

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  9. i can totally understand that, haha.

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  10. 1. I almost always wear a Yankees hat. But here's the thing, I don't like the Yankees. I even hate baseball. It's just sentimental to me from when I used to live in NY.

    2. I've never even attempted to learn how to drive stick. I need to, though.

    3. I'm obviously a vegetarian. And as a vegetarian I usually hate other vegetarians. They have attitudes just like you described. I usually get a lot of idiotic questions about my beliefs, but never do I get offended by them. I respect other peoples ideas and practices and I expect the same. End of.

    4. Amen.

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  11. Haha this list is perfect

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  12. I figured that you weren't a militant. Your blog rarely has anything about vegetarianism on it anyway so you're not the agenda pushing type. Good on you.

    Ohh and driving stick is fun. you should try it. Just not on my car. I had to just about relearn how to drive stick to even do it and I'd been driving stick since I learned how on our tractor when I was 13 or so.

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  13. i agree with all of these. although i haven't really had any run-ins with wide receivers. RED SOX!

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  14. we can kill the militant vegans any time , when you start the anti militia lemme know im down

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  15. For every animal you don't eat, I eat three.

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