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Thursday, October 28, 2010

Light Bulb

So I said I was going to post about cover bands today, but I don't want to go into that just yet. I want to go to bed or something. I don't want to leave you guys with nothing though, so have some light bulb jokes.

How many sex addicts/nymphomaniacs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
At least two, but it has to be a very big light bulb.

How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to screw it almost all the way in and another to give it a twist at the end.

How many bodybuilders does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to screw it in and the other to stand next to him and chant "You're lookin' huge man, you're lookin' HUGE!" while he does it.

How many armies does it take to change a light bulb ?
At least five. The Germans to start it, the French to give up really easily after only trying for a little while, the Italians to make a start, get nowhere, and then try again from the other side, the Americans to turn up late and finish it off and take all the credit, and the Swiss to pretend nothing out of the ordinary is happening.

How many pro-lifers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, one to do it and one to insist that the bulb was lit when the screwing was done.

One.
How many psychics does it take to change a light bulb ?


How many Dragon Ball Z characters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one, but it takes him four episodes to do it.

How many male chauvinists does it take to screw in a kitchen light bulb?
None. Let the bitch cook in the dark.

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